by Sarah Schwerin
My mom, a pastor’s wife, once told me a story about one of the many churches she and my dad served. Every week, the church held a dinner before the Wednesday evening service. The meal was simple but filling — hearty soups, sandwiches, and casseroles.
When the church began hosting the meals, the basement filled with the regular midweek attendees. Yet as the weeks passed, members invited friends and relatives. Since the church was in rural Appalachia, a few people invited the community, where many had trouble filling their pantries and tables.
Unwelcome guest
Not long after they invited the community, a shabbily dressed man entered the cozy basement, grabbed a soup bowl, and sat down to eat.
One of the faithful church members approached my mom. With his face turning pink, he pointed across the room. “What’s he doing here?”
My mom looked at the man who sat quietly eating, then turned a blank face to the parishioner. “What do you mean?”
“He doesn’t go here.”
She glanced between the newcomer and the man, who loosened his collar and glared across the room. “I’m sorry, I don’t understand.”
“We can’t let everyone come to the meal. We should probably just keep this for us.”
Personal conviction
When my mom finished telling me the story, I didn’t know what to say. How could someone be so callous, so mean — especially someone who claimed to be a Christian? I wanted to show mercy, to give others what they didn’t deserve.
Yet as the years have passed, I have made the same mistake as the irate man made at my mom’s church. I haven’t excluded anyone from a meal, but I have forgotten to show mercy to those who needed it most.
Mercy is kindness
The Bible teaches us so much about mercy. In Matthew 9:13, Jesus quotes Hosea 6:6: “For I desire mercy and not sacrifice, and the knowledge of God more than burnt offerings.”
Jesus came to the earth to show us what mercy looks like and how to extend it to those around us. As He exemplified, mercy is being kind to others. Chatting with our neighbor when we get the mail. Letting someone else go in front of us at the grocery store. Paying for a stranger’s coffee. Asking a store employee how they feel. Yet so often we miss opportunities to be kind to others.
Much as we do in daily rush hour traffic, we live at a frantic pace. We go to work and do our job. Then we return to our families, ferrying our kids to their activities, catching up on what we didn’t have time to do over the weekend. We seldom look up from our devices or our schedules to see the needs of others around us. We miss the lonely neighbor, the homeless man who’s always by the gym, the co-worker who can’t stop crying. Mercy is taking time to slow down and put the needs of others first.
Mercy shows no favoritism
Yet being merciful to those around us can be difficult. Just ask the man at my mom’s church. He wanted the meal to be only for church members, not the community. He didn’t want someone dressed like that to take what belonged to him and his church.
Showing favoritism can creep in when we least expect it. We clutch our wallets and purses a little tighter when we pass by a certain type of person. We make sure our car doors are locked when an unkempt person crosses the street. Sometimes we might think our churches and Bible studies should have people only like us. When someone looks or acts differently from us, we might make judgements based on our beliefs and opinions, not fact.
Yet Jesus is clear: Mercy shows no favoritism (Romans 2:11). His message is for everyone. We are not to judge based on appearance or actions. The sloppily dressed woman with bags under her eyes may have stayed up late with a sick child or parent.
But what if she is a drug user or a prostitute? Should that change how we treat her? Jesus said no. Jesus loved and ministered to the outcasts of society, and we must do the same. In fact, the lowest in society need our love and kindness the most. As James wrote, “My brothers and sisters, do not hold your faith in our glorious Lord Jesus Christ with an attitude of personal favoritism” (2:1, NASB).
Those who have made a lot of mistakes and find their resources, friends, and family scarce need a helping hand and a kind word more than those who pretend to have it all together. God didn’t come to this world for those whose lives appear perfect. God came for those who have messed up and live messy lives, who see that they have a need only God’s mercy can fill. If we believe in God, it is our job to model His behavior: showing no favoritism and leading others into a relationship with Him.
Mercy is forgiving
Another stumbling block to showing mercy can be the grudges and anger we hold on to just as tightly as we hold on to the steering wheel when someone cuts in front of us.
I can relate. Inwardly, I’ve seethed and justified my unforgiving attitudes and actions. How could they have treated me that way? I’ve made sacrifices and played by the rules; I deserve good things. They’re reaping the consequences of their poor decisions. They don’t deserve mercy.
But the truth is, none of us deserves mercy. We’ve all done things we shouldn’t, but God shows mercy to all who ask. God has forgiven me. God wants to forgive all of us. And He calls us to forgive others.
In the parable of the good Samaritan (Luke 10:25-37), the story’s hero is the audience’s enemy. The religious leaders, the good people of the day, did not help the wounded man. Instead, someone the Jews had grown up hating showed mercy to a man in need.
Jesus admonished the crowd to be like this man, their enemy. To be as merciful as the good Samaritan is to make time to be kind, to not show favoritism, and to be forgiving.
How can we be merciful?
My mom has passed away, and I don’t know what happened to either of the men at that church dinner my mom talked about. But I remember the man who didn’t show mercy, and I try not to be like him.
I have to be real, though. Life is busy and hard. Being merciful becomes another task to check off the list, not a way of life. Wrong attitudes creep in. Unforgiveness wraps its slimy tentacles around our hearts.
We find the key to living a merciful life in the Bible. As we study it and pray, we draw closer to God. He shows us a way to live that differs from the way the world lives: He shows us how to be merciful. When we let God guide our lives, He will change our response to including and loving others, instead of looking at them as though they don’t belong.
We will live by the words of the prophet: “He has shown you, O man, what is good; and what does the Lord require of you but to do justly, to love mercy, and to walk humbly with your God?” (Micah 6:8).
