{"id":7029,"date":"2017-05-22T04:00:07","date_gmt":"2017-05-22T04:00:07","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/equipmagazine.org\/?p=1698"},"modified":"2023-08-29T11:21:13","modified_gmt":"2023-08-29T17:21:13","slug":"five-disguises-christian-gossip","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/baonline.cog7engage.net\/five-disguises-christian-gossip\/","title":{"rendered":"Christian Gossip: 5 Common Disguises of What Should be an Oxymoron"},"content":{"rendered":"
Christian gossip.<\/em> Ponder that term with me for a moment… Shouldn’t it be an oxymoron?<\/p>\n [bctt tweet=”‘Christian gossip’ should be an oxymoron. – Caitlin Meadows”]<\/p>\n Unfortunately, Christian gossip<\/em> is not an oxymoron. Instead, it is a common sin in the Church.<\/p>\n Why do you look at the speck that is in your brother\u2019s eye, but do not notice the log that is in your own eye? Or how can you say to your brother, \u2018Let me take the speck out of your eye,\u2019 and behold, the log is in your own eye? You hypocrite, first take the log out of your own eye, and then you will see clearly to take the speck out of your brother\u2019s eye.\u201d Too often I listen to a sermon or read Scripture and think about someone else<\/em> who would benefit from it.\u00a0For example, messages addressing\u00a0gossip.<\/p>\n People who have hurt me by speaking against me or my loved ones are on my list of gossip offenders. It infuriates me that these individuals can do this without recognizing how sinful it is. Almost as much, it infuriates me that others listen to the gossip without calling it out for what it is. Such an ugly speck this gossip is.<\/p>\n Hold on a second, I need to clear my eye out quick. I have a log stuck in it.<\/p>\n Just like I have been the subject of others\u2019 gossip, I am guilty of gossiping about others. Likewise, I am guilty of listening to gossip and not calling it out for what it truly is.<\/p>\n When I participate\u00a0in Christian gossip I fail to lead<\/a>\u00a0in the way that Christ has called me. Much worse, I lead\u00a0those who do not know Him to not want to know Him at all. Why should they want to be like me and follow my God when I fail to speak kindly about others?<\/p>\n I’m not alone in this.<\/p>\n How does this offense so easily infiltrate the body of Christ? Like Satan disguises himself as the innocent lamb, Christian gossip disguises itself in benign forms. Regardless of its disguise, the affects of Christian gossip are destructive.<\/p>\n A perverse man spreads strife, and a slanderer separates close friends. Psalm 16:28<\/p><\/blockquote>\n As Christians, we cannot be perverse yet still glorify our King. We must call gossip what it is – sin. To do this, we need to recognize the disguises it takes on to access the Christian\u2019s life.<\/p>\n \u201cI really need to get something off my chest\u2026\u201d That\u2019s usually how my gossip begins. I justify this gossip disguise by assuring myself that I only vent to certain people. And I only do it to clear my head. So, it\u2019s most definitely harmless and not<\/em> gossip. After all, I have the right to tell my husband everything and my sister is a vault, so it\u2019s alright. Right…? Yet after venting I am always left with that gnawing feeling in my spirit that what I did was wrong. Sin is sin, not matter what I call it.<\/p>\n \u201cI wish I could wear\u00a0whatever I want without caring what others will think. You know, that’s what I admire about so and so! She doesn’t care how weird and ill-fit her clothes are. She just wears\u00a0whatever she wants because she likes it! If only I could be that<\/em> secure with myself.\u201d\u00a0Otherwise known as a back-handed compliment, the praise disguise is the kind of gossip in which a person is negatively spoken of in a way spun to sound positive. If I ever feel I have to make my negative opinion about someone sound good in order to share it, I don\u2019t need to share my opinion at all. Kindly worded insults are still gossip which is still a log that will get lodged into my eye if I let it.<\/p>\n \u201cPlease don\u2019t share this with anyone, but I know you\u2019ve been there so maybe you\u2019d have some helpful insight. Could you join me in praying for so and so? Her marriage is crumbling. Apparently, she and her husband fight constantly. It\u2019s heartbreaking!\u201d When I share another\u2019s confidential information for the purpose of prayer or advice, it\u2019s okay because my motivation is concern, right? Wrong. Without permission to share someone else\u2019s personal information, it is gossip when I do. My loving concern for another person means I protect their privacy. It is unnecessary to divulge another\u2019s confidential information when asking others to join in prayer because the One we are praying to already knows the details. If a third person has wisdom that could bless the one who is struggling, I should discretely connect the two and let them converse privately.<\/p>\n (Note: When we become aware that a person\/people may be in danger, it is our responsibility to share that information with authorities who can help protect the individual(s) from harm. This is not gossip.)<\/em><\/p>\n \u201cIs it just me, or do you think so and so is dating the wrong person? They just seem terrible for each other! Correct me if I\u2019m wrong\u2026 Am I totally off base?\u201dClarification, very akin to concern, is a nasty way in which gossip disguises itself among Christians because it seems so selfless. I form a negative opinion of something another person is doing and want to share my sentiments. But I can\u2019t be mean about it because that\u2019s gossip! Instead, I share it with the purpose of seeking correction. What should make this gossip disguise obvious to me is the compulsion to defend my original opinion when correction is provided. Selfless as it can seem, sharing negative opinions about someone while feigning the desire for clarification is still gossip which is sin, no matter its disguise.<\/p>\n \u201cShe\u00a0said I did what? Well, that\u2019s her\u00a0interpretation! I don\u2019t want to say too much but since you\u2019ve heard some things already, let me give you my side of the story.\u201d It is unfortunate how easily the cycle of gossip perpetuates! There have been many times I have determined in my mind not<\/em> to discuss a certain painful situation involving someone else when suddenly it is brought up by a third person and I discover that my name or the name of someone I care about has been smeared. My indignation flares and my determination not<\/em> to discuss the situation becomes determination to defend<\/em> the smeared name.<\/p>\n If presenting a defense means I have to disparage another person, guilty as they may be, my defense is still gossip. Thus, it is more beneficial to keep my side of the story to myself. As children of God, we can wait and rest assured that He will defend us (Psalm 18:1-3). As long as we are living in accordance with His leadership, we have confidence that the truth will prevail without having to defend ourselves (John 3:21). Certainly we can offer correction when words or actions are misinterpreted, but never at the expense of another person.<\/p>\n [bctt tweet=”We need Christ’s cleansing light to shine on our sin. – Caitlin Meadows”]<\/p>\n Gossip is a sin that can so stealthily lurk in the corners of our hearts, even as followers of Christ. We need Christ\u2019s cleansing light to shine on it, enabling our continued sanctification. Thankfully, there is no limit to the forgiveness offered by our Savior. Our personal spiritual lives will thrive when we are intentional about recognizing our sin, submitting it to God, and allowing His Spirit to purify us for the purpose of glorifying our Heavenly Father. And with His forgiveness covering our sin, we can proceed to live with the intention of pointing those around us to Christ who willingly clears out every pesky speck and log from our eyes so that we can see Him clearly and reflect Him to others.<\/p>\n With Christ’s leadership, Christian gossip<\/em>\u00a0truly can become nothing more than an oxymoron.<\/p>\n Honestly recognizing our weaknesses (like the tendency\u00a0to gossip) is important\u00a0as we embrace our role as everyday Christian leaders in our communities. But, it is equally important to recognize our strengths! Want to learn what your leadership strengths are?\u00a0Download\u00a0Artios Christian College\u2019s free guide on\u00a0Discovering\u00a0Your Leadership Strengths<\/em><\/a>.<\/p>\n
\n\u2013 Jesus, Matthew 7:3-5<\/p><\/blockquote>\nConfession Time…<\/h3>\n
Five Common Disguises of Christian Gossip:<\/h3>\n
1. Venting:<\/h3>\n
2. Praise:<\/h3>\n
3. Concern:<\/h3>\n
4. Clarification:<\/h3>\n
5. Defense:<\/h3>\n
The Solution for Christian Gossip<\/h3>\n
\n